Thursday, December 31, 2015

Last day

Without realizing, we have come to the time of the year where we reflect and see if our year resolutions have been crossed.

This year have been really tough, it's like riding roller coaster in hell. Those who said that they had a rough year, if you're only a student with no sickness at all, I don't think yours will be as rough as mine. Coz all ya had to do is finish your damn assignments and enjoy uni life.

This year, people whom I least expected, whom I didn't know would mean so much to me right now, showed up and helped me when I needed them the most. On the contrary, people who used to meant a lot to you vanished like thin air. When they got too caught up with their own lives, you are no longer important to them. Without a simple word of caring like "how are you?" once in a while.

Perhaps I put too much expectations on them. Perhaps I have to get used to all of these. People came and left without a trace. To those few who really cared, I sincerely thank you very much. I hope you won't erase me in your memory too soon. 

I have no resolutions. I just wish that there's someone out there who can pull me out of this dark valley. I really need that someone who truly understand me instead of seeing me as a nuisance and want to get rid of me. 

I just hope that all of these will end soon.

Sunday, December 27, 2015

Cinderella 2015

I have always been a huge fan of Cinderella. I blogged about it 3 years ago and Imma blog about it again. This year March, Disney released a live action version Cinderella, no twisted ending, just the plain old classic Cinderella.

I have to say, it was the most enchanting, magical and wonderful Cinderella movie ever made, yes even surpassed 1950's Disney animated version. 

Fox movies recently broadcasted it, and I've watched it every time it shows. You just can't get enough of it. Watching Cinderella makes me feel like a child again. It's one of the few things that made me happy. I find that there's two most magical moment, the first is Cinderella's transformation, and the second is the dance. Don't you feel like you're floating in the air when you watch them dance? Well actually every romantic dance scene made me melt =)

There's one thing I wanted to point out in this movie - the costume. 
Every piece of them was so painstakingly designed and made by the talented English designer Sandy Powell.

Did you know that Cate Blanchett who plays Lady Tremaine in the movie actually changed more than 10 costumes? Don't believe me? Here there are. Watch closer, they may be similar in silhouette, but they are totally different dresses.











One of the costumes in deleted scenes.



The mourning part (Deleted Scene)


The mourning part (Deleted Scene)

All of her costumes were really exquisite and luxurious. Lady Tremaine is trully a Parisian with fine taste as described by the narrator. Poor Cinderella only had 3 costumes throughout the entire movie.
Cate Blanchett is the perfect candidate for this role, she pulled character off wonderfully. You can definitely feel the evil stepmother aura.

This is one of the deleted scenes. I really think the mourning part should be included.

I just found out Lily James sang her version of  "A dream is A wish your Heart make".
The song was sang at the end credit and I just found out lately! 

Here are some of behind the scenes. You can see how much effort they've put into making this magical moment transpired. Especially the grand ballroom and costumes. Thanks to all the crew and cast, Cinderella die hard fans' dream could come true. 

Do you wanna know why I like Cinderella the most among other Disney princesses? Cause it taught me that the most wonderful and magical thing can happen to anyone with a pure good heart. And 2015 Cinderella's main message is "Have courage and be kind."

Though we may not have enough actual prince for all the ladies out there, but I'm sure somehow we'll find that prince who owns our heart.

Click here to read my post about all the Cinderella's that I've watched 3 years ago.

Christmas isn't Christmas anymore.

While everyone is busy decorating their houses with christmas tress, wrapping presents and preparing for Christmas events, I'm one of those who don't look forward to all of these. 

Those who know me and read my blog will surely know the affliction I'm going through especially this year. Sadly not many come forward and give a damn about me. That's why I always hesitate to tell people about my real condition. Because they won't care anyway.

This sickness caused me to lose faith in God and also Christianity. 

It's the worst Christmas ever. I have no anticipation at all. I can't even bring myself to listen to my favorite Christmas songs.

But looking at pictures on fb made me jealous and forlorn. There's this conflict inside me. I wanted to be part of those joy and yet how could I find joy if I don't believe?

Christmas was supposed to be and it used to be the most wonderful time of the year. 
I just wish those days would come back.

By the way, talking about presents. One of my acquaintance who is currently staying in England, showed off how many presents she had received from her English boyfriend's family. She literally got a present from EVERY member of that family she's staying with. My first thought was "wow, these western family are very particular about presents. They make sure everyone has it."

Another acquaintance posted a photo on her fb saying the value of the present doesn't matter, it's the heart that matters. And guess what was captured in that photo? An Iphone 6s! Irony and hypocrisy much?! 

Friday, November 27, 2015

It's the pressure

A few days ago, the Malaysian were gobsmacked upon hearing the tragic death of a SPM student.

While everyone mocks and blames him for his daft act, I completely understand his situation.

Some are already prancing around when they get 3-4 As, but for students who work our ass off and put 100% effort in preparing our exams, we have that expectation. We want that straight As so bad. No one could fathom the pressure built inside us. That pressure to get good grades so that we can get scholarship, so that we can enter good uni, so that we can have bright future. It's a long heavy chain that leads one to another. It's a heavy burden to bear when you're expected to not only score well, but also achieve that desired goal. We couldn't dare to imagine what if we fail. We couldn't let ourselves down, we couldn't let our parents, teachers, classmates, down. We just couldn't.

Is it wrong to have high expectations from ourselves?
Is it wrong if we wanted to achieve that goal?
Is it wrong if we want a better future?

Hon ye choose not to share with anyone about his feelings. It's a sad thing. He didn't have anyone in his mind whom he can trust to help him. At that point, he's downright disappointed at himself, he's totally depressed, he didn't think that he could score A anymore for add maths paper, he couldn't bear the thoughts of the repercussions of not getting straight As, he couldn't think of anything else, at last he gave up.

If only he's willing to open up that long bottled pressure which is about to explode, if only he knew how to seek help, if only he has the courage to face everything, if only there's someone he's close with could give him a warm hug and say everything is going to be fine at that particular juncture, if only he knew that there are so many other available scholarships out there waiting for him, if only......

Unfortunately it's too late.

Don't blame the dead, he didn't know how to seek help, and you never know what is going on in his mind. Let's just hope that after this incident, parents, teachers and counselors will be more aware of their children/students.

Wednesday, November 25, 2015

It's hard to believe.

I have come to a point where I'm doubting the existence of God. I'm pretty sure they are many Christians out there who are facing this problem right now.

When everything is falling apart in your life, and your long awaited prayer is still not answered, that's where doubt came in.

I've been through so much this year. When I have been hurt really bad, I needed a shoulder to cry on, a warm hug and comforting words to help me get through this, God wasn't there. Apparently, I was told to quote bible verses to comfort myself in times of need. I don't want to memorize verses from a book to console myself. In fact I find it pathetic. I need a real human to be there for me when I have no one else.

I'm angry, disappointed, and downright depressed and yet God can't do any of these.

When your illness miraculously healed, we say it was God's might hand on work.
But when a person dies from that illness, we say God gives and takes.
Everything sounds so justified with God.

In my younger days, I just follow whatever the church member does. They raise their hands, I raise my hands. They say we must join this course and that camp, I joined everything. I never question any of those. They say spread the gospel, I even share it to my 85 year old grandma a few times, who is still a non-believer. They make me believe there's heaven and earth. Non-believer will go to hell. They make me believe that my died relatives will go to hell.

They say listen to God's voice, close your eyes, feel the Holy spirit. How do we know if it's just our own voice. They told me if it's good then it's from God, if it's bad then it's from Satan.
Everything good has to do with God.

If you ask them how to proof the bible is real? They quote a verse from the bible.
If you ask them how to proof God is real? They say faith.
The bible says the earth exist 2000 years ago, but science says otherwise and we see no miracles so far.
The bible says as long as you believe in Jesus, you'll go to heaven, but it also says sins will lead you to hell. All these years, I'm being indifferent and believe all these shit.

You know what, I don't care anymore if there's heaven and hell.

Bible says we are made in his image. But why are there blind, mute, limbless, mentally ill, retard?
Does God changes his appearance when he made these people?
Why does God bless some and some not? Why is God not being fair?

I hate God and religion.
Religion is a total bullshit. It divides us, it took millions of lives, it made us follow ridiculous rules.
It has done more damage than good throughout the history. All these religion books were probably written by a lunatic who is schizophrenic and all of us just blindly believe it.

I don't know what to believe anymore.

Friday, November 20, 2015

My wonderful cards

First of all, I want to thank and praise the Lord for sending an angel (not directly from heaven, but from Facebook) to help me earn some little money from doing things I like to do - making cards!

His name is Edgar Pong. A very successful person. How successful?
Owning a BMW, BenZ and a half a million condo at the age of 26 ONLY!!!!!

He's an insurance agent, a coach, a financial consultant, an author, and now a CEO of his own company - Generation Superstar. He's launching his new program called Pitch2Profit.
If you wanna know how to become successful like him, just click HERE. Your journey to success will begin in a click a way.

Edgar story inspired me, without further hesitation, I joined his program. When we met, he discovered my (very amateur) talent on art. So he ordered 20 cards from me.

So here they are, meticulously handmade Birthday and Christmas pop up cards.
I called them my precious babies.

Handmade Pop Up Christmas Cards

Handmade Pop Up Birthday Cakes

Took me 10 days to finish 20 cards. Only God and my mum knew how much effort I've put into these babies. I've visited more than 1 trip to most of the stationery shops in KK, Kaison as well. Edgar offered me a handsome price for all of these. He said my cards should receive the same amount of value just like how some people are willing to pay millions for a painting. Honestly, not many people appreciate handmade stuff nowadays. Thank you Edgar once again for the offer, I hope your clients like it and appreciate it like we both do.

Tuesday, November 3, 2015



第一次去 MBO看戏,戏院有点小,但至少清洁。不像Center Point,又脏又臭。



我第一次看到宋芸桦的时候是在《等一个人咖啡》,那时候觉得这个人好面熟哦,好像在哪个节目看过。后来想起, 她不是那个和James一起主持《爱玩客》的主持人吗?但是 Google 了一下才发现原来他们完全是两码人!















Monday, November 2, 2015

My Checklist

This is my checklist. Hope to get these all done before due date, which is my death.

So here it is:

1. Work on a cruise ship
2. Have a cruise ship vacation
3. Write a book and publish it
4. Learn latin dance (with my soul mate if available)
5. Have my desired weight
6. Get up close with a celebrity I like and take photos with him/her/them
7. Attend my favorite celebrity concert
8. Travel at least once to overseas (wait, does Labuan count? hehe No.)
9. Learn a new language (Either Korean, Japanese, Thai, French or Spanish)
10. Get healed

What are yours?

Thursday, October 29, 2015

Colour out your imagination

Colouring has become a trend lately, thanks to Johanna Basford, the illustrator of the adult colouring book, Secret Garden. I don't want to be left behind, so I bought myself a copy and try it out. It certainly brought back that nostalgic feeling. The last time I coloured was back in form 3.

  These are China's own version which I bought at Kaison for only RM6.90 if not mistaken. 
A lot of times, we have to thank China for providing us with more cheaper choices.
There are 24 drawings on 12 sheets. I intentionally choose the easy side.
 However the surface is shiny so I can only use magic pen and glitter pen to colour. 

  Colouring is said to be stress relieving which I find it quite true. Did you know that one of the activities for the patients in asylum is colouring? It sets your mind free for a moment. I personally think that this works more effectively than the new launched app Pause. I mean like COME ON, you are already spending so much time on your gadgets, why need to waste more time on it?  

 Don't have drawing talent? Don't fret. 
These wonderful colouring books had it all drawn painstakingly for you.
You don't have to restrict yourself. Just use whatever colour that you desire. 
Unleashed your creativity to the max. 
By the way this tree is my favorite and the glitter pens brought it to live.

I went to Imago Popular a few days ago, they just restock their colouring books with now more variations. You can choose from different themes like Birds and Butterflies, Circus, Dreamy Fantasy, Mandala and etc. I hope they have princess theme. Coz I LOVE princesses.
They are now currently on discounts. Even cheaper with member price. 

So what are you waiting for? Hurry up go to your nearest Popular or Kaison store to get a copy before they are sold out. It is also available at Mr. DIY Wawasan. 
Let that long buried inner child of yours run wild once again. 
Just one teeny tiny tip, choose a less complicated one. You'll be running out of colours. 
Especially green.

Happy colouring =)

Wednesday, October 28, 2015

They ain't girls anymore.

I was watching Mean Girls the other day, and gosh Lindsay Lohan was so young and pretty, and drug-free. So I'm gonna bring ya'll "time travel" by looking at how far these childhood teenage diva had grown into. Let's start with...

1.Lindsay Lohan.

 Remember this sweet young 12 year old girl with lots of freckle? She's 29 already.

The Parent Trap 1998
When I was young, I REALLY thought these 2 were twins and when I found out about Lindsay playing both the characters, I had a hard time believing it. I was like NO WAY!!!! BUT HOW?!
Obviously I didn't have much knowledge about digital stuff back then.

I grew up watching her movies, from Life Size, Herbie, Freaky Friday to Mean Girls. 
By the way, all the Mean Girls are also in their 30's already.
She didn't appear in major box office movies anymore, which I think mainly due to her reputation of going in and out of rehab. 

Apparently drugs and age didn't do much good to her face. 
Not even make up and lip fuller can save that once before sweet look.

2. Raven Symone

The older generation might recognize her in the late 80's sitcom The Cosby Show whereas I remember her as the psychic high school girl in Disney's Sitcom That's So Raven.  

That's So Raven 2003-2007

It's been 8 years since the last episode of this sitcom was aired. 
This girl is turning 30 on December 10th. 
Bye bye youth. Hello wrinkles. 
By the way, she's a lesbian.

She certainly doesn't look good in that nude makeup. 
Not to mention that hideous hair.

3. Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen

The only celebrity twins whom I know. 
Famous for playing the role of Michelle Tanner in Full House at the tender young age of 1, 
the Olsen twins quit acting after their last movie flop, New York Minute. (I find it kinda nice though)

New York Minute 2004

I grew up reading their books from primary school all the way until secondary school. 
I guess twins just double the fun of everything. 
They are currently active in the fashion industry.
Mary Kate got married last year to half brother of former president of France, Oliver Sarkozy. 
He is older than MK a whopping 17 years!!!

Someone feed these girls already!
Anorexia makes them look like middle age hag and they are only 29! 

4. Ashley Tisdale
Gained her breakthrough in the High School Musical trilogy, Ashley definitely left a deep impression in every teen's memory. 
In fact I adore her more than Vanessa Hudgens in that movie. 

She got married last year September to singer Christopher French.
Vanessa is one of her bridesmaid.

Still looking fabulous. Instead of colourful outfits and golden blond, our 30 year old Ashley opts for more matured look which suits her perfectly with that ombre. 

5. Hilary Duff

Also one of my favorite childhood actress, 
this Texan girl has now become a mother of a 3 year old boy named Luca. 

A Cinderella Story 2004

Unfortunately she and her former NHL husband got divorced last year. 
What is wrong with these Hollywood celebrities?!

Is it me or the turquoise hair makes this 28 year old lady look older? 

Do these former Disney actress remind you of your wonderful childhood?
It sure does to me. 

Rewatching these coming of age movies is definitely a good way to walk down your memory lane.
Some of them still looking great while some of them need to intensify their anti aging regimen.
I hope that these woman will continue to inspire younger fans like us. 
Hope you like this article. =)

By the way, I just found out that October 21 2015 is THE date the characters back to the future in the movie "Back To The Future". No wonder my facebook news feed is full of its stuff and comparison.